Grow up!

“We should think about others and not about ourselves”

(I Corinthians 10:24

I love children.  I especially enjoy engaging in conversation with them.  They will happily tell you how they run their lives.  Children usually want their own way, which is why they say “no” to their parents, or “I do it” rather than asking for help.  It is also why they don’t listen to the wise advice of most adults.  

If you have raised children, you know that it is a battle of wills – yours and theirs.  At least that has been my experience.  However, when that “me” attitude carries over into our adult life there arises issues that can damage ourselves, and everyone around us.  That damage is narcissism.  Narcissists are self-assured, controlling, and argumentative.  They push people away who they think can’t or won’t help promote their personal agenda.  They crush most of their relationships.  They are users and abusers.  They have big plans for their life, and if you don’t buy into those plans, you’re out. 

Now here is the statement no one is going to like me saying, but if we are willing to face the truth, we must admit that we are all childish, and we are all have narcissism as well.  We all want our own way.  If you are someone who doesn’t agree with that statement, let me ask you a couple of questions.  Have you ever tried to hide your weakness?  Have you ever protected yourself from being vulnerable to another person?  How do you handle constructive criticism?  Are you jealous of what other people have or do?  Do you criticize others behind their backs?  Do you exaggerate your achievements?  Are you afraid of taking a risk for fear you might fail and look bad?  I could go on, but these questions are convicting to me.  Are they you? 

So what exactly is our problem?  Our problem is this – we want to be the center of our own little world.  All we really want is our own way – in everything.  We don’t want to be told what to do, when to do it, or how to do it.  We want to wear the crown and sit on the throne.  Whether we are 6 months old or 60 years old, we are controlling and narcissistic because of our sin nature.  The rebellious sin that is in all of our hearts. 

We forget that we are NOT God.  We forget how perfectly sovereign God really is.  We forget that God’s plans for our life are the very best plans.  When we lose sight of who God really is, we will lose sight of who we really are, and start believing we are someone we are not.  Somewhere between childhood and becoming an adult, the best thing that can happen to us is the realization that apart from God, we are nothing; yet in Jesus Christ we are everything good and righteous.  We don’t have to wallow in our self-absorption.  We don’t have to always have our own way.  We don’t have to protect ourselves.  We can grow-up and embrace Jesus Christ’s will for our life.