“Bear with each other” (Colossians 3:13)
They drive us crazy. They make us angry. They cause our blood to boil. They irritate and frustrate us. They annoy us and provoke us. They are what we point to as the reason we lose our temper and pull our hair out. What is it that causes us to lose it? People! Irritating, over-bearing, drama-prone, over-talkative, egotistical, selfish, critical people! I could add more to the list, but we all know who they are. They are the people we find ourselves impatient when we’re around them. They are the people who make us cringe when we learn we are going to have to interact with them at a family reunion, church function, office party, or just walking out our front door. Every family, every neighborhood, every workplace, every church, every committee has at least one of them. They make us roll our eyes and look for the nearest exit in a room.
The question isn’t why certain people irritate us so much. The question is what do we do with people who drain every ounce of patience out of us? The apostle Paul wrote in Colossians 3:13 that we are to “bear with them.” What does he mean by bear? The Greek word for “bear” is a word meaning, “to hold up against a thing.” That does not mean we are to build a barrier and push irritating people away, tempting as that can be at times. The word actually means that we are to endure the irritation others bring us. The word also means to tolerate, be patient, delay punishment.
The even bigger question is how do we do this? How do we keep our temper under control when we’re around irritating people? How do we speak kindly and act graciously to them? The answer to those questions we find in the remainder of verse 13 of Colossians 3 – “forgive as the Lord forgave you.” We start by remembering who we are. Remembering what an irritating sinner we are and all that Christ has forgiven us, will help us realize that God has given us a grace we never deserved. Then from that grace, we can extend the same to others. In other words, pay grace forward.
We aren’t forgiven because we earned it. As rebellious, irritating, foolish, and egotistical as we are, we are forgiven because through the death of Jesus Christ, God has chosen to pour his grace out upon us. John 4:19 really is a helpful verse to follow in our relationships with others: “We love because he first loves us.” Remember that the next time you come face to face with an irritating person.
Darlene